its really hard being a Hindu, because i wanna taste beef but i can’t because of religion. damn.
mY SKIN IS WHITE???
I’M NOT INDIAN???? I’VE NOT BEEN A HINDU FOR 16 YEARS BECAUSE MY PARENTS ARE ALSO HINDUS??
cAN I FINALLY STOP WORSHIPPING COWS?!?!?!!
I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”
when you n ur babe standing on rocks
im gonna fart so loud and when i leave you will finally understand why storms are named after people
"gays will push their sexuality onto their children"
funny because that’s exactly what every straight person does.